(Ep.67) From Depths of Addiction to Heights of Redemption

Welcome back to another episode of let's Just Talk About it podcast. I'm your host, chuck, and if you're here for the first time, this platform was created to give genuine people just like you an opportunity to share a portion of your life's journey. So, with that being said, I decided to do a Flashback Friday episode with my very first episode, which was about me, but this time in a visual and audio. You can find the visual on my YouTube page. You can also find it on Facebook just type in Chuck L J T A I and I wanted to do this because it's been 20 years since I was freed from prison and 27 years since I've been freed from an heroin addiction, so I give God praise for that. So I thought about it. I would I tell my story, a piece of my journey, in such a way that would keep my listeners attention and, if you're anything like me, I love movies that get straight to the action. So that's exactly what I'm going to do. So here goes. First of all, I grew up in a place called Cavalier Manor, a section of Portsmouth, virginia. Well, growing up wasn't bad. I actually had fun as a kid because there was so many things to do, like Little League football, little League baseball, going to the gym, swimming pool kids were everywhere. So we had a lot of fun. But my setback came around 1992, when I decided to drop out of high school, for no other reason than I thought I was grown and smart enough to handle life with no education. Hey, guess what Wrong move. And you know what? I had good parents. They treated me good, but I just didn't want to listen at the time. I thought I knew more than they did. So now I'm a high school dropout and I got a job at a nursing home called Camelot Nursing Home in Chesapeake, virginia, and I had already started snorting heroin before then. But hey, when I got that job at the nursing home, I started snorting every single day, not knowing that what I was developing is what's called a habit. In other words, my body needed it to function throughout the day. I mean, man, I couldn't get out of the bed, I couldn't do anything without first getting a bag of dope. That was started out being fun quickly turned into a drug addiction. And at the time I had a 1992 burgundy colored four door GO prism that I used during my lunch breaks to go get a bag of dope. I went to places like Lincoln Park, audubaba, jeffrey Wilks and then Portsmouth, virginia. I would also go to places in Norfolk Virginia like Bowling Park, tidewater Park and Grandi Park just to get one bag of dope. But I also had this best friend you know, his name was Mark who would come to the job at the time back then to get my car, to go to the projects to get a bag of dope for the both of us. So you can imagine that mornings became more and more tough just to get out of the bed. So if you ever use heroin you know exactly what I'm talking about. That is no joke. But I finally quit that job before they fired me at the nursing home because I kept missing time at work because my body just wouldn't function. However, my cousin got me a job working with him at a place called Goldberg Hardware in Norfolk Virginia around 1994, which was another bad move for me because the hardware store was directly across the street from the projects called Young's Park or Young's Terrace, which was one of the major spots at that time that you could find heroin in. So now I got easy access to get what I needed to get through the day because all I had to do was walk out the back door of the hardware store and go directly across the street. And because that hardware store was independently owned, they had no problem with giving me a portion of my paycheck throughout the week. So by Friday I was already asking for money from my next paycheck. Crazy right. But in the meantime I met this girl around the early part of 1995. She lived in the city where I was from. She had three amazing young boys and eventually we moved in together at a place called Academy Park in Portsmouth, virginia. But guess what? It was another bad move for me and her, because we were both young and we were both using at the time and two people struggling with the same thing under the same roof equals major problems. Because now, instead of hustling up money for just one person me now I had to do it for two people. And in the midst of all that, I eventually lost my job at that hardware store because my only means of transportation got impounded Yep, that 1992 Geo Prism and I never got it back. It broke down on the side of the street and I never would to go get it. So the people came and got it. And man, because I was out there trying to get high. I forgot about the car and they told my car way. So now I have a drug addiction, no job, no money and bills. So every day I mean every day I'm scrambling for two people to get high, until around the fall of 1995, when I met this guy who introduced me to the stick up game, you know, robbing yeah, to put money in my pocket. This guy provided the gun for me and the locations to hit. So now here I am, doing crazy stuff to feed a young family and a gorilla called addiction. I call it a gorilla because once heroin gets inside your body it's heavy, it's hard to get it off. So I call it a gorilla. But on February, the 12th 1996, it will be the last time that I would ever hold a gun for a while or see the streets again, because me and my co-defendant got caught by the police as we were trying to get away from an attempted robbery. I mean we was on the bus trying to get away from a robbery. I mean the police stopped the bus and surrounded it, pulled us out of the bus, threw us up against the canine truck, dogs barking in our faces, lights were everywhere and it landed us both on the seventh floor of a city jail, better known as 8 11. Listen, man, I had a drug addiction, no money, and now I'm incarcerated with no bond. I thought it was over for me, because not only did I hurt myself, but I also hurt the ones who really love me, like my parents, who were there for me when the friends you know walked away. So there I was, lying on the mat on a cold jail floor on the seventh floor of a jail called 8 11, around people I didn't even know. But the next day, on February the 13th, as I was lying there trying to cope with my body going through some painful withdrawals, this older gentleman that was a visiting preacher who came to pray with the men on certain nights. He pointed at me through the cell bars this is a true story and he asked me. He said hey, young man, out of everybody in the cell. He said hey, young man, do you want to be saved? And without giving a thought, because you got to understand something. I was in a dark place at the time. I didn't know the outcome of what was going to happen. So it was. It was like I was at the end of myself. I didn't know what else to do. So it was like it was at the right time when he asked me that. So when he said it, I said yes, without even thinking. And he said repeat after me, just say the prayer after me. And I did that. And at that time I realized, from that day forward, after I said yeah, yes to the Lord, that out of all the bad choices that I ever made in life, that I had finally made the right one, because after that night I can honestly say I never looked back. You know that it was like God took the taste out of my mouth for heroin and, believe me, I had a craving for it and I've been clean now for 27 years. I'm not perfect, but I'm a whole lot better. However, making a choice to commit a crime doesn't come without a cost, because the judge sentenced me in the same year, november the 4th, I remember 1996. He sent his meter 10 years with two suspended, and in those years I was the prison in Virginia, like Deerfield, camp 25, lawrenceville, st Brides, and I came home from Camp 4. But while I was at those places, I believe I grew as a man. I became more appreciative. I realized in those years. You only get one life to live. I'm going to say that one more time you only get one life to live. Once it's gone, ain't no coming back. You know what I mean. So, after doing seven years and eight months of my eight year sentence, I came home in 2003 to my family and 20 years later, by the grace of God only by the grace of God I'm still here. And the question I always ask my guests is what would you say to your younger self If you could go back and prepare him for today? What would I say to Chuck to prepare him for right now? I would say number one don't do drugs. Number two avoid the prison system. However, I believe that both of those situations played a major part in who I am today. So I would really say to my younger self hey, man, you're going to go through some things, you're going to go through an addiction, you're going to go through the prison system, but hey, god's got you, don't give up. He got you, you know. And so, through it all. I want to give a shout out, special shout out, to my mom and dad for sticking by me doing my incarceration and my addiction, and I just want to say thank you to them, because there were moments where they knew I was high and my mom prayed for me. One day as I was laying down and I jokingly talk about it she put Vicks vapor rub and put a cross on my head and prayed for me and I just instantly fell asleep and that was one of those things I remember doing my addiction. So I just want to say, shout out to them for never giving up on me, and there may be somebody who's listening. You may have a son or daughter who's going through an addiction or who may be incarcerated. I just want to say never stop praying for them, because God's hands are way bigger than ours and can go to places like prisons to rescue our, your children. You know, like he did me, and I want to say to some parents too who may have lost your child doing an overdose you may be blaming yourself. I want to say to you don't blame yourself, because us, as children, we make choices that have ripple effects on our families that we don't even know you know. So that's what I encourage you you may have done no wrong, it's just the choices that we make in life. So, but to those who you know who have children that are incarcerated or may be addicted to something like fitting all or whatever. Never give up on them, never stop praying for them. You know what I mean. So, as always, thank you so much for tuning in to let's just talk about it, podcasts. Please check out my website. Just Google, let's just talk about it, podcastcom, and then hit that subscribe button to receive all the new episodes every Friday. You can also find me on Facebook. Just type in Chuck L J T A I, which means let's just talk about it, and so I'm starting this new visual thing with the podcast. So if you want to be a guest on my show or do the audio, doesn't matter, just let me know and reach me and let's just talk about it. 22 at yahoocom. As always, until next time, don't hold it in, but let's just talk about it. Coach L T has scammed.